


Salvation, Salvation

by sinkingtowns



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Armin Arlert Dies, BUT it's only because im trying to prove the point that erwin needed to die, Biblical Themes (Abrahamic Religions), Canon Divergent, Erwin Smith Lives, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Oneshot, Return to Shiganshina Arc (Shingeki no Kyojin), mans needs rest not the colossal titan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29252382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinkingtowns/pseuds/sinkingtowns
Summary: It is a beautiful, harrowing thing to watch an angel fall.— In which Levi is more than selfish and Erwin is less than human.
Relationships: Levi & Erwin Smith, Levi/Erwin Smith
Comments: 5
Kudos: 44





	Salvation, Salvation

It is a beautiful, harrowing thing to watch an angel fall. 

The descent from grace does not come in a flurry of feathers and teeth. Instead, it comes in a rush of steam and blood, blood - so much blood. Hard to believe such a thing was divine, once upon a time.

Levi watches as one wingless angel emerges from his vessel, wonders quietly how human it will be.

Through the dense cloud, all he can see is a silhouette. Its broad shoulders are hunched over and feeble, its face is pressed to the ground with fearful piety. Steam hisses and bites at Levi’s cheeks and a single drop of blood that had yet to dry rolls down his face, warm. He wipes it from his eyes, but does not blink, does not look away. Time passes. Or it doesn’t. The whine of the steam finally wanes to nothing.

Levi’s heart seizes in his chest.

 _Beautiful_ is all he can think. _Beautiful and terrible_. 

From the nape of the titan, Erwin rises. His hair is plastered across his forehead, gold and damp. Shreds of raw muscle peek out from the skin underneath his eyes. He looks impossible - he _is_ impossible - and he is the same. The curve of his jaw, the sweep of his nose, the shell of his ear. All these places Levi had mapped with his hands, the same. And just as ever, it hurts to look at him. 

Someone screams.

All at once, Erwin is violently hurled back into himself. He silently brings his hand to his face, trembling and reverent and careful. He bends each finger, one by one, like they don’t belong to him. His lips part with a silent whimper.

Slowly, slowly, he drags his gaze up to Levi, something between fear and awe in his eyes. The two of them are one house apart, each perched on some cracked, forgotten roof. Erwin’s titan is mutilated and evaporating; even the pool of blood he sat in just moments before is all but gone, inching smaller in wisps of silver.

On the unkillable impulse that lives inside him, Levi juts his chin out, defiant and proud. He is not proud. He is so, very tired. A question colors the air before Erwin. Levi is not sure he has the answer.

The person screams again, and though Levi doesn’t look away - can’t look away - he knows the awful animal shriek comes from Eren, knows it is for the charred memory of a boy that lay beside him. Days ago, under the stars, the same boy had spoken of a thing called the sea. Levi wonders what the sea is.

The awe drains from Erwin’s eyes. There is only fear. Maybe _this_ was the sea: large, blue, endless. Far too large for Levi to comprehend. It’s under his skin, it’s in his bones. God, it’s _everywhere_. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts. He cannot look away.

Tendrils of steam claw at Erwin’s right shoulder. Slowly, surely, the gnarled stump of his arm stretches and swells. They both watch as five little lumps form at the end and, eventually, unfurl into fingers, long and lithe. In one hand, Erwin clutches at the rags hanging loosely off his torso, and in the other, Levi’s entire being.

“I’m alive.” It is a whisper. It is a prayer.

Regret. All those years ago, Levi promised this angel he would not regret anything he did for as long as he lived. Yet here, now, it comes - cold and heavy, seeping through the cracks left behind by whatever frenzy had possessed him before.

He had been at peace, he was no longer a devil. But Levi - he is so selfish. That’s all he’s ever been. Taking and taking and taking - and now, even when Erwin could not possibly give anymore, Levi still takes. He does not find it in himself to mourn.

“I’m sorry.” It is a prayer. It is a whisper.

A tremor knocks through Erwin, then, and before Levi realizes it, he’s using whatever breath of air is left in his tanks to swing across the alley and onto the adjacent rooftop. He stumbles over the lip and barely makes it three steps across the shingles before his legs buckle and he crumples to his knees. But never once do his eyes leave Erwin’s face. 

This close, Erwin is completely and utterly ethereal. God must have loved him dearly before he fell - so gold and unreal that Levi doubts he would be able to touch him if he tried. Does he deserve to touch him? And Levi, he is completely and utterly destroyed. In that moment, on his knees before this celestial monster, he thinks of praying. He resists the urge to kiss the grimy, holy tiles at his feet. 

Suddenly overwhelmed and out of depth, Levi reaches out to take Erwin’s hands - Erwin’s _two_ hands - into his own. He doesn’t feel entirely himself, doesn’t feel his actions are entirely his own, but in such close proximity to _him_ , he doubts anyone would be able to maintain their grasp on humanity. When his fingers lightly brush over the raw new skin of Erwin’s, there is a jolt at the base of his spine. 

Then Erwin rips himself away. 

“Don’t touch me.” His voice breaks on the last word, and it guts Levi to his core. He chokes on anger, on guilt, on nothing and everything. It hurts to breathe.

He knows, then, what this choice had cost him. The clouds above part, just enough for the falling sun to bathe the broken city in light. Shiganshina welcomes its second devil.

Levi pulls back and sets his jaw, back a little straighter, eyes a little darker. He allows himself one more moment to behold the angel, who now refuses to look at him.

Without warning, he shoots his arm out and Erwin flinches away, away. Something small in Levi’s chest curls inward. But he does not touch him. Instead, he gestures out among the sea of corpses and ruins. The sun makes it all far more breathtaking than it deserves. 

“Welcome back, commander,” his voice is a thousand knives. He cannot stop himself.

“Your hell is waiting.”

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was partially inspired by @bapplebubble's [post](https://www.instagram.com/p/CK2AmxVl_C6/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link) on instagram. look at it!!! doesn't it hurt like a motherfucker!!!!!
> 
> comments & kudos are appreciated i’ll give u a fat kiss if u do


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